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I'm kelly and I'm kind of an asshole


portablemiah:

dude if you think about it we’re already astronauts. earth is in space. we’re in space. dude


queefito:

i know stuff i just dont know how to properly phrase it and that makes me so mad


you be the teacher ill be the student ;)
okay
write an essay on whether theatre architecture of a particular period always reflects that period's culture. i want it on my desk by monday
oh no but... thats such a hard essay... is there anything i can do for extra credit? ;)
no
but professor.... surely then i could... persuade you to extend the deadline...? ;)
no
so... what do you want, professor?? ;)))
an essay on whether theatre architecture of a particular period always reflects that period's culture. on my desk. by monday

Where are the owls? WHERE ARE THE OWLS?
Please sir, you're causing a fuss and disturbing the other customers-
*banging my hands rhythmically on the table* WHERE-ARE-THE-OWLS? WHERE-ARE-THE-OWLS? WHERE ARE THE OWLS?

bleachdalilah:

thtwhitegurrl:

slutdust:

I bought my friend an elephant for their room.

They said “Thank you.”

I said “Don’t mention it.”

Is there a joke here that 15 thousand people get but I don’t?

PLEASE EXPLAIN


drarna:

the bible says adam and eve not uggs and shorts

(Source: neptunain)


jossisgod:

p3rspective:

You may mess up, but you’re not a mess up.

You may make a mistake, but you are not a mistake.

You may screw up, but you are not a screw up.

You may fail, but you are not a failure.

You are not your downfalls.

Everyone, at some point or another, needs to hear this about themselves. 


breadmaakesyoufat:

myheartbeatsliketimpanidrums:

dxmndelion:

how much would it cost to buy fall out boy

Probably more than you bargained for.

image

(Source: spookynarcassist)